I think one of the secrets to decent diabetes management is management … of priorities.
November of 2010 I had the best lab report I’ve had since I was in my early 20’s. Best A1C, best cholesterol, best everything. I hadn’t made any purposeful changes to my diabetes routine, I wasn’t testing more, I wasn’t counting carbs better, I wasn’t watching what I ate any closer than usual. But I had been exercising like crazy.
I was been spending three to four hours per day at the YMCA playing basketball and lifting weights, and I felt great. I am lucky to have found an exercise that I really enjoy (basketball). While playing basketball I am having fun, and that’s why I do it. It just happens to be great exercise too. How lucky am I?
I had no job(s) though, and that doesn’t last for long. The bank account has been empty (or negative) for a long time, and I needed to find some income. I’ve been super stubborn about trying to find something I can put my heart into, something that helps people with diabetes and supports my family at the same time. But I haven’t been able to find anything. I’ve had to put my dreams on hold for a while (if you have a job/contract/project I can help with, let me know!).
Since then I’ve picked up about four part-time jobs, only a couple of which I like, and none of which pay enough of the bills to let me drop any of the others. It’s terribly distracting and I feel like I’m being pulled in a million different directions, leaving me at less than my best for any of them.
Worse though, is that I haven’t played basketball or lifted weights for two weeks. And I can feel it. My body hurts, I’m crabby and irritable, I’m not sleeping well, my blood sugars are volatile and sharp. I’m just not happy.
I let some bullshit part-time jobs creep in and take priority over my exercise.
There is a lot of tension and anger because I feel trapped in many ways. I have to support my family (earn income), and I have to take care of myself (exercise), but I feel like it’s nearly impossible to balance those two things. I can work all the time to make ends meet, and fall apart physically (and mentally), or I can exercise a lot and not have enough money to pay the rent.
I am re-prioritizing my life around exercise again, with faith that the money side of my life will fall into place somehow. I am going to try my best to keep my guard up against all that tries to creep in and pull my focus away from what is important. I am important. My health is important. My diabetes management is important. And for all of that, exercise is important.
We can always sleep in the minivan…