I Don’t Deserve This High

I did everything that I am supposed to do, according to what I’ve been told.

I followed all of the “rules”.

I counted all of the carbs.

I checked my blood sugar.

I did all of the math.

(68g carbs / 7.5g per unit = meal bolus) + (current BG (163)- target BG / 35 mg/dl per unit) = total insulin to cover my meal and bring my slightly elevated current BG down to my target BG.

My “meal” was two vend bags of wheat thin crackers from the machine. Maybe not the best choice nutritionally, but it’s not like I had a snickers bar and pop tarts for dinner. And it wasn’t really a meal, per se, but rather an afternoon snack.

One hour and forty five minutes after eating I check my BG.

Insert the strip, poke the finger, squeeze the finger, apply the blood, BEEP, watch the little animated symbol, BEEP, a mumbled “mother fuck” escapes my lips, 303 mg/dl.

I probably tested a little bit too early, a fair amount of insulin on board yet, I did have a heck of a time battling lows during basketball (that’s fun – I’ll tell you about it someday), I may have had some exercise ketones floating around, but when I checked there were none showing. Lots of possible reasons to be running a bit high, but 303 mg/dl is uncalled for in my opinion.

Is my infusion set working? Did I reconnect it properly after showering when I was done with basketball? I surely would have noticed an eleven and a half unit bolus if I wasn’t hooked up correctly, right (puddle of insulin, wet clothes, the smell of it)? So what gives? Was my food choice really that bad? Maybe, but it seems like a lot of “punishment” for wheat thins.

Is it necessary to be trying to “figure it out” for an entire lifetime? Is there a point where one can stop troubleshooting things? A point where things run smooth? Enough already!

There are still so many unknowns to diabetes, and living the life with it is a never-ending source of blogging material.

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Scott K. Johnson

Patient voice, speaker, writer, and advocate. Living life with diabetes and telling my story. All opinions expressed are my own and do not necessarily represent the position of my employer.

Diagnosed in April of 1980, I recognize the incredible mental struggle of living with diabetes. Read more…