For the Record – Absolute Shyte

Just for the record, my diabetes management has been absolute crap for the last couple of months (plus).

I think it is some kind of mourning period from my last A1C surprise.

Really high blood sugars and a “poor me” attitude have left me feeling tired and cranky, irritable and angry.  I feel like I’m coming through it now, but damn, what a ride.  I’ve been trying to eat it all away which makes me feel even worse after the first 10 minutes of food induced pleasure.

This period of acute depression is downright paralyzing, and when I fight up the strength and energy I apply it in a rebellious way rather than productive.

It dawned on me that I go through this period of mental struggle after every “bad” A1C result.  It takes me almost a full three months to pull out of it, lining me up for another shitty A1C result.  The difference seems to be that I expect this one to be crap, and can then get on with life.  It’s the ones that surprise me that throw me off balance.

With that recognition, and about a month before my next blood draw, I’m working through the last bits (I think) of bad attitude and moving on.

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Scott K. Johnson

Patient voice, speaker, writer, advocate. Living life with diabetes and telling my story. Patient Success Manager, USA for mySugr (All opinions expressed are my own and do not necessarily represent the position of my employer).

Diagnosed in April of 1980, I recognize the incredible mental struggle of living with diabetes. Read more…