Wayback Wednesday – My First “blog” post?

Picture of my hand with a BG line chart in the backgroundCourtesy of the “Wayback Machine“, I bring you the very first entry I made in my online diabetes journal.  This was back on February 28, 2000.  Far before Blogger made things easy, and I had to write the entries in HTML.  The journal is no longer available, but thanks to the wonderful tools available on the internet, I was able to find much of my old stuff.  I’d like to share it with you.  It was a pretty traumatic event that led me to start recording things.  I guess I didn’t want all of the emotions involved with living life with diabetes to go unrecorded.


28 Feb 2000

Well, I had a little “incident” Thursday (2/24/00) night. I had my first seizure since jr high school. That was about 13-15 years ago. This was the first reaction I’ve had that I needed help with since about that time too.

It was like a bad dream. I woke up and there was two para-medics and my wife looking down at me (just like you see in TV…). One of the para-medics was holding a bag of glucose that they had given me via IV. They kept asking me what day it was, etc.

Then, it all started to make sense. I was really upset that this happened. I had played basketball earlier that night. I didn’t test my blood-sugar before playing. During the 1st or second game by infusion set came out. That happens a lot. Usually it’s Ok, because I’m playing basketball – I usually need to turn it off for a while, otherwise I’ll get too low. After the first couple games we sat down for a break. When our turn came up again we got on the court. My muscles felt funny. Very crampy, especially my calf muscles. I thought it was just from sitting down too long. I didn’t have the energy I did the first few games, and just generally didn’t feel good. We played a few more games, then I decided I was ready to leave. I tested my blood sugar, and it was 393!!!! No wonder I felt like crap!! My blood-sugar must have been high before I started playing. I immediately took a shot of 14 units humalog.

I drove my friend Chris home, then headed for my house. When I got home, it had been maybe 45 minutes to an hour since I had taken that shot. I did another test and now it was up to 513!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Then I went into a panic! I took another shot, don’t even really know how much, but it was a lot, maybe another 14-20 units. I was getting worried about DKA. I jumped in the shower, then immediately replaced my infusion set – and pumped some more insulin. 40 minutes later I was down to 443. Ok, that’s a good sign. I went to bed, and was thinking I would wake up and do a test in a few hours.

That’s the last thing that I remember before waking up with the para-medics in my bedroom.

After it has all sunk in, I’m really frustrated with the way I’m taking care of myself these days. It’s really hap-hazard. I’m riding the high-low roller coaster all the time!! My motivation has been very low lately. I’m frustrated that my wife had to go through that trauma – it was probably the scariest thing that she has been through. I’m frustrated that it is so hard to do what I need to do. I’m frustrated that diabetic supplies cost so much money. I’m frustrated that medical insurance companies make it hard to get the supplies I need. I’m frustrated that medical suppliers make it hard to get the supplies I need. I’m frustrated that life insurance companies deny me just because I’m diabetic. I’m frustrated that I have to count how many doritos I eat. Sometimes I just don’t want to think about all that.

But, I have to. I have no choice. I need to

find a way to deal with all the things I need to deal with. I only make it worse on myself the more I fight the system. And really it’s not the system I’m fighting, it’s myself. I struggle with the discipline necessary to be in good health. I need to be better.

Sigh…I wonder what my co-pay will be for that ambulance…


 

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Scott K. Johnson

Patient voice, speaker, writer, advocate. Living life with diabetes and telling my story. Patient Success Manager, USA for mySugr (All opinions expressed are my own and do not necessarily represent the position of my employer).

Diagnosed in April of 1980, I recognize the incredible mental struggle of living with diabetes. Read more…